Crown Point Divorce Attorney Blog

Judge orders Deion Sanders to pay child support

2012-05-18T17:33:02Z

Football Hall of Famer Deion Sanders' divorce case is costing him quite a bit of money. A Texas judge awarded the former athlete's estranged wife, Pilar, $10,500 per month in child support and $3,500 per month for mortgage payments. The judge also ordered Deion to pay $275,000 for Pilar's legal fees. However, she was ordered to return some of Deion's property which she allegedly stole while he was working for the NFL Network at Super Bowl XLVI in Indiana.

Despite the recent orders from the judge, the divorce case has quite a bit more details to be worked out, including some child custody issues. The couple plans to work out a long-term custody agreement regarding their children. However, for now their sons will remain with Deion while their daughter stays with Pilar.

]]> Although the couple is now living separately, until recently they were both living under the same roof in Deion's mansion. However, the situation exploded recently when both parents were hit with family assault charges. A judge ordered a 500-foot restraining order on Pilar, forcing her to move from the residence. Indications are the couple plans to work out the remaining details of the divorce in arbitration.

Similar to the Sanders' case, many Indiana divorce proceedings can become contentious. This may be especially common in cases involving child support and child custody issues. This can add even more stress on family relationships. Those couples who are able to maintain some level of communication may find that they have a leg up on negotiating a fair settlement that is in the best interests of both parities without requiring the assistance of a court to decide unresolved issues.

Source: USA Today, "Deion ordered to pay $10,500 per month in child support," Nate Davis, May 16, 2012

Honoring a special father this Mothers' Day

2012-05-12T23:32:30Z

Often, particularly in the past, it was customary for courts in Indiana and elsewhere to award custody to the mother rather than the father. However, with increasing frequency fathers are asserting their rights and showing that they are absolutely capable of doing a fantastic job raising their children and maintaining child custody.

This Mothers' Day, one daughter is choosing to remember the father that raised her when her mother stepped out of the picture. When the daughter was just a toddler, the parents made the decision to divorce; the mother was still just a teenager. The mother was deemed unfit to parent by the courts and so the daughter's father was awarded sole custody.

]]> The daughter speaks fondly of the father that raised her even though he was a "rough-and-tumble" kind of guy. She recalls a father -- now passed away from complications due to cancer -- that loved her enough for two parents. He would keep watch at sleepovers, took her bra shopping and soothed her heart when it was broken by young boys.

In present child custody cases, there has been a trend toward creating a parenting plan more encompassing of both parents, in an attempt to allow children that have divorced parents or parents that were never married, a chance to be raised by two parents.

This father is a fantastic example that both parents are equally qualified to play a significant role in their children's lives. It is something truly special that this daughter takes time every Mothers' Day to remember her beloved father.

Source: MyWestTexas.com, "Single father fills motherly roll in daughter's life," Cindeka Nealy, May 10, 2012

Mediator: Man's best friend

2012-05-01T23:29:40Z

For some couples, pets become like children. They nurture their pets and develop a strong emotional attachment that is difficult to quantify. In the case of child custody, when a mutually agreeable decision cannot be reached, litigation will determine a parenting plan and a court order will determine which parent will be the custodial parent and subsequent visitation. It is not the same with pets when it comes to divorce.

Pets are considered property and as such can be awarded to one spouse over the other as though it was a couch or anything else deemed marital property. In many situations in which both sides present a significant investment in a beloved animal, divorce mediation may be a very beneficial tool. In a mediation setting, both parties would hire a neutral third party to reach an agreement about custody and visitation of the pet.

]]> In one high-asset divorce in which the settlement was about to dissolve over the custody of the family dog, the former couple agreed to joint custody and found that the mediation process actually may have helped a fractured relationship. The mediator is quoted regarding the couple as saying, "They were actually on better terms when they left."

Divorce mediation is not reserved for pet mediation only. An entire divorce can be settled via this arrangement in Indiana and elsewhere. Or, mediation can be employed to solve one aspect of a split: property, child custody or even spousal support. Mediation can avoid costly, drawn out and very possibly painful litigation. Many parting couples have shown great success parting ways on these terms.

Source: The Wall Street Journal, "A Dog's Bark Is Better Than Litigator's Bite," Veronica Dagher, April 30, 2012

Man that was not the father jailed for missed child support

2012-04-17T19:42:47Z

The father of two was going through some difficult times. He and his wife separated in 2006 and then the man began a very brief relationship with another woman. The relationship purportedly lasted only a few days but resulted in the woman accusing the man that he was also the father to her child. As such, the man was ordered to pay child support and when he failed to do so, insisting that the child was not his, he was jailed.

DNA testing has cleared scores of erroneously accused individuals and this man is no exception. When a paternity test proved the jailed man was not in fact the father of the child in question, he was released from custody. However, under Texas law, where the incident took place, the man still owed $50,000 in child support even though his parental responsibility over the child was released. Luckily for this man, the mother of the child decided to relinquish her claim over the money.

]]> In Indiana, it would be critical to ensure that any agreement between parents went through the proper procedure to be court-approved. If, for example, the mother allows the father a verbal modification of child support, but a judge never signs off on the modification, the mother can take the father to court for delinquent back child support.

Child support can be modified in Indiana if an ongoing, continuous and substantial change arises that would result in the current amount being issued as unreasonable. DNA testing has cleared scores of erroneously convicted individuals and now it may be helping to clear up paternity and child support disputes.

Source: CBS DFW, "Man Jailed For Child Support For Baby That Wasn't His," Carol Cavazos, April 12, 2012

The secret to a good divorce: Mediation

2012-04-12T19:32:02Z

Divorce can be a difficult conclusion for any Indiana couple to come to. However, just because a couple is parting ways does not mean that the couple is going to have a "bad divorce." There are several things that couples can do to end on good terms and it starts with divorce mediation.

A divorcing partner should allow themselves time to work through all the emotions they may likely be feeling. Working through emotions rather than bottling them up will more than likely prevent the former spouses from leveraging the legal systems and resorting to costly and drawn out litigation to get back at their former spouse.

]]> Being with the end goal of remaining amicable in sight. If a couple constantly thinks with this mentality, they may be more likely to respect each other in divorce proceedings. This doesn't mean that a spouse shouldn't do their homework. It is important to be aware of the type of lifestyle that a spouse seeks and to make agreements accordingly.

Part of working through these emotions for a spouse is working toward the goal of letting go of any blame. In divorce, couples may often be inclined to point the finger and play he said she said. This isn't productive. The present situation is the marriage just wasn't right and the best thing to do if a couple seeks to remain amicable is move forward in a positive direction.

While keeping these things in mind may seem simple, they just may be the secret to securing a "good divorce." Particularly if children are involved, there are any benefits to an amicable split in Indiana.

Source: Huffington Post, "8 Secrets to a Good Divorce," Eileen Barker, April 11, 2012

How can fathers better their chances of gaining child custody?

2012-04-05T13:56:44Z

There is an outdated notion that children are better off in the custody of their mother. This is simply not universally true. There are plenty of outstanding fathers in the state of Indiana and it is important that their rights are upheld.

However, it would be foolish to labor under the assumption that there isn't a slight bias against fathers when it comes to determining custody. If a father is seeking to gain child custody, he would do well to follow the advice laid out below to present the best case for custody of his children.

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Judges seek the best interest of the child and as such, it can often be traumatic for a child to see their father move in with a new woman, solidifying the end of the relationship with the children's mother. Until the custody proceedings are finalized, the father would do well to avoid moving in with a new significant other.

Just as the judge may maintain preconceived notions about a mother being the best custodial parent, the judge may also have preconceived notions about men being domineering. As such, it is best for the father to avoid appealing to this bias at all costs by avoiding yelling at the mother under all circumstances.

It is important to be respectful of the mother and her need to maintain open communication with her children, just as the father may wish the same respect of the mother. If the children are in the father's care, it is important that the father allow the mother to speak to the children if she calls. Furthermore, it is critical that the father keep the mother informed if the father has intentions of taking the children on vacation or outside of the area for any reason.

Finally, avoid talking poorly about the mother. At some point in time, the mother and father likely shared a similar circle of friends so it is best for the father to speak of the mother bearing in mind that everything he says could get back to her and be used as evidence against him.

Source: Huffington Post, "Ways to Sabotage Child Custody," Joseph E. Cordell, April 2, 2012

Communication in divorce mediation

2012-03-28T20:49:14Z

In a traditional divorce, each former spouse may be represented by their separate lawyer and proceedings can be long and drawn out in the court room. Divorce mediation can, for some couples, be an alternative to the headache of a traditional divorce. With divorce mediation, each former spouse can have the opportunity to resolve any differences prior to going to court. The process is overseen by an objective third party that assists in reaching agreements.

Part of the divorce process, and particularly in cases of divorce mediation, is communication. As much as an individual in Indiana may wish to never speak to their ex again, in some instances, it is necessary. Ineffective communication can prolong the proceedings and cause more headaches.

]]> To effectively communicate with your ex-partner, consider the following points:

An individual should tailor their communication with their ex-spouse according to their ex-spouse's distinct personality traits. The individual should deal with the present personality, not who they thought or wish they married.
Remember to be courteous and avoid placing blame.
Maintain a businesslike tone. Stay cordial, but steer clear of getting too personal.
Individuals should bear in mind that anything said or written has the potential to be used as evidence against that individual.

Through maintaining effective and respectful communication, couples divorcing in Indiana may be able to amicably part through the aid of a divorce mediator. Whether using a divorce mediator to solve a singular issue of a split, such as child custody, or using the mediator to determine entire divorce, communication is essential.

Source: Santa Monica Mirror, "Communicating With Your Ex After Divorce," Andra Brosh Ph. D. and Allison Pescosolido M.A., Mar. 25, 2012

Support ordered for twins conceived via donor sperm post divorce

2012-03-21T15:29:14Z

In Indiana and states across the country, parenthood is not as clear cut as one may assume. However, the court does make it clear that if an individual is found to legally be the parent of a child, that individual is liable for child support payments.

In an unusual case, a mother is seeking child support payments from her ex-husband for support of their twin daughters conceived via in vitro fertilization, using donor sperm and egg, after the couple split.

]]> It appears that the couple spent nine years married and unsuccessfully trying to have children. A year after the couple divorced, donor eggs became available and the husband gave his former-wife his blessing to continue with the process under the condition that he was not legally responsible for the twin girls that were subsequently born.

Both parents are from Nigeria. The father says that he only agreed to support the process of his ex-wife moving forward with in vitro fertilization and mothering the children because he needed her continued support in seeking his citizen application. The court ruled that the intent of the father was beside the point.

The court ruled that by consenting to the process of in vitro fertilization, the man was legally making himself the father. This ruling negated the written contract the couple devised. The court ruled that, "Simple consent to the procedure is enough to confer parental status ... the law will attach parental responsibilities as a result." The man, and legal father, must now pay court-order child support. If he does not pay, he could incur severe consequences.

Source: Boston.com, "Court says father owes support, despite deal," Peter Schworm, Mar. 7, 2012

Indiana mother's custody battle goes international

2012-03-13T15:48:20Z

One Indiana mother has taken her fight international to regain custody of her children. The child custody dispute began when the mother filed for divorce from the father of her children in 2010. An Indiana court awarded the mother custody but the father returned to his home country of Cyprus with the children.

The discrepancy went international when a Cypriot court also awarded the father custody. Reportedly, the father illegally obtained passports for the former couple's two small children through forging the mother's signature. Both parties have representation fighting on their behalf and attempting to resolve the custody battle in their respective jurisdictions.

]]> The woman was allowed by the Cypriot court to visit her children after 14 months of not having physical contact with them for only 90 minutes. Furthermore, the 90 minutes was ordered to be supervised by the father and the paternal grandmother of the children. The Cypriot court appears uninterested in continuing the case but the Indiana mother possesses no such desire.

While the Indiana mother has been jailed in her relentless pursuit to see her children, she will not stop. The mother continues her plea to local representatives, the media in Cyprus and whatever additional resources she can think of. Friends are attempting to lend their support in any manner they can in an effort to aid with the cost the woman has incurred.

The Indiana mother has kept supporters updated on her tireless efforts through social media outlets. One of her recent posts stated: "Please pray for my safety as I travel to Cyprus. Please pray that I am able to have my children with me and spend time with them!"

Source: The Republic, "Friends back home follow Northern Indiana woman's barrel in Cyprus for custody of children," Virginia Black, Mar. 11, 2012

Indiana bill could affect rapists' parental rights

2012-03-06T14:29:55Z

Under an Indiana bill that has passed out of the Senate, rapists could lose their custody rights. In Indiana, over 700 babies each year are a direct result of rape. State law in Indiana, and several other states, maintains that rapists are fathers and uphold the same fathers' rights as a child that was conceived consensually.

This new bill aims to change this fact by prohibiting rapists from ever having contact, much less custody, with the child that resulted from the rapist's actions. The hope of this bill is to protect the mother and child from harassment.

]]> The state senator that authored the bill was inspired to do so after he met with a woman that was a victim of rape and decided to keep the child she subsequently became pregnant with. The woman's rapist relentlessly harassed the victim in his pursuits to gain child custody. The Senator aimed to put a hard stop from this type of disturbing scenario and additionally provide women that are impregnated resulting from rape more incentive to carry the child to term.

The bill is coming under some criticism. One alley for such criticism is that there is an exception to the case: married couples. Furthermore, some legislators are arguing that it should be the woman's choice if she desires the father to maintain contact or not, and this bill would eliminate that right. However, one of the maybe most detrimental aspects of this bill is that by removing the fathers' rights, the convicted rapist would no longer be obligated to pay child support.

Source: The Indy Channel, "Bill Would Strip Rapists Of Parental Rights," Feb. 15, 2012

Indiana woman killed by ex-husband in murder-suicide

2012-02-28T20:39:31Z

Tension can run incredibly high in cases of divorce. There may be bitter and unresolved feelings in the aftermath of a split. Sometimes these feelings drive people to do irrational, crazy things. One man in north Indiana was driven to such senselessness earlier this week.

The trouble began when a man was in pursuit of his ex-wife. The ex-wife fled and took shelter in a convenience store where the clerk behind the enclosed counter let her take refuge. Sadly, this was not enough, the man was able to reach his hand through the deli counter and shoot his ex-wife in the shoulder.

]]> The woman was rushed by helicopter to Parkview Hospital in Fort Wayne, Indiana, where she later died from the wound. Meanwhile, police were after the deranged ex-husband. They followed him to the empty parking lot of a local community college. When spotted by authorities, the man shot himself in the head, taking his life.

It appears as though the couple shared the same address but lived in separate trailers on the same lot. Obviously, something went wrong and caused the ex-husband to snap. The woman was frightened of him and the clerk told reporters she was yelling at him, " ... I'm not going nowhere. You go. You go."

It is still unclear what exactly went so wrong. Authorities are currently talking to relatives to piece together the sequence of events. While the exact events are unclear, the fact that this violence was unnecessary is abundantly clear. Divorce can be difficult, but never so difficult as to warrant a murder-suicide. Whatever the root of the dispute between the former couple, they could have sought several other avenues to mediate their issues.

Source: The Northwestern, "Police: Woman shot by ex-husband in N. Ind. Dies," Feb. 27, 2012

Changes proposed for child custody and support in Indiana

2012-02-24T15:50:18Z

Currently, in Indiana there are two proposals, one being looked at by the Indiana Supreme Court and the other by the Indiana legislature, which -- if passed -- would result in changes to child support and child custody rules.

When looking at child support in the state, Indiana is one of only three states in the country where payments are made until the child is 21. However, to fall more in line with the rest of the Midwestern states, the legislature is considering changing the age to 19.

]]> Sources claim that changing the age to 19 makes sense, considering the fact that many parents will still be financially helping their children at that age with college costs and other necessities. Additionally, the thought is that these teens are adults at 19, and need to take on more of their own financial responsibilities.

Aside from child support changes, the Indiana Supreme Court is looking at possibly making changes to parenting time guidelines in the state. These proposed guidelines include creating a more clear-cut schedule in terms of which parent has the child or children for vacations, holidays and visitation. The idea is that in contentious divorces, having these plans laid out a year in advance will deter future fights regarding visitation between the parents.

Also, with high tension divorces, children are often stuck in the middle. However, under these proposed changes, a parenting coordinator would be assigned to those high-conflict divorces.

Lastly, under the proposed child visitation guidelines, parents who live hundreds of miles away would have access to their children via technology, like Skype. This would help parents and children communicate better than only seeing each other a few times a year.

In terms of lowering the age for child support, if passed by the legislature, the new rules would take effect on July 1. For the child custody guidelines, the courts are taking public comments on the proposal until March 26.

Source: msnbc, "Custody rule changes debated by Indiana lawmakers," Feb. 22, 2012